xoxo, gossipkitto 🫦

OKAY OKAY so last night I slept over at my grandparents house and I decided to look into a box of my stuff they had kept in my closet! I estimate most of these items are from 2012-2014! Right before I went to uni!  First up we have a very period accurate Playboy body spray... It still works and lowkey still smells good? The scent is baby powder!! :3 THE next thing I uncovered was this glittery wallet my bestie Boob gave me! Boob used to stay w me every now and then, I had a spare room and anyone was welcome to stay :3 U can see some glue residue from where the metal clasp bar came off and I glued it back together :'3 Inside it we have a ticket to a water park, a Cone Pizza loyalty card (it was pizza in a cone form and it was sadly mid), and assorted receipts and debit cards :3 Here's a cigarette case I bought ot help me reduce smoking! It only fit 8-10 cigarettes but I'm pretty sure it did not help lmfao I probably...

Crazy colugo A phrase used to express mild surprise or concern when someone does smth unhinged.  Ex: "Unc over there is scratching his whole foot at the restaurant" "All his dogs out. Crazy colugo"  Colugo needs to be institutionalized For when the vibes are so dire "crazy colugo" just doesn't cut it anymore 😭😭  Ex: "Unc is putting his foot shavings in his food" "Colugo needs to be institutionalized."  If this is ___, chain me to the fucking wall A phrase used when discovering smth that absolutely should NOT be like that  Ex: "My sister has put together a list of her friends who she would like me to have sex with. And she's decided who gets to go first" "If that's ur sister, chain me to the fucking wall". Shid and fug  An expression similar to "oopsies!" and covers every emotion between "oh no" and "I am wanted by the government"  That's shoebox, babey!  Similar to ...

OUUGGGHHH besties as u may know I got married a few months ago! It was a beautiful ceremony... But my heart was BROKEN... I smiled on the outside but tears streamed on the inside... Why... Bc my LEAST FAVORITE UNCLE had tragically chosen to DEPRIVE me of his presence T_T Yes, as guests sang, danced, and ate while catching up with old friends, two empty seats at a corner table could simply not be ignored... Finally, a couple of weeks ago, I got my answer )': The day began w me rushing my grandpa to the hospital following a stroke (he' s back home and fine now thankfully!). Many hours later, my Uncle Chungus roly polied into the HDU, his stomach bulging from the delectable lunch he had been enjoying despite full knowledge of his father being rushed in due to a grave medical emergency.  After some time had passed and he had had enough time to make passive aggressive remarks abt my grandpa w my mom, I asked him: Me: What happened to u and Chungita (his wife)? I was expe...

Okay so this past week's Hot Girl Enchirnment Activity was Household Treasure Hunt!! Me and boo dug up some forgotten bullshit from all around the house - above are the items we chose to uncover! I'm gonna choose ONE item to reintroduce into everyday life! WOW!!!!!  First up we have this zebra print Duck Tape we got at Ace Hardware not too long ago. It's honestly kinda period accurate to 2013 but idk what to do w it rn. It's unopened tho!!  Hist fate: back to storage  Next up here are some random ass face masks I found at the bottom of my beauty stack in my bedroom?? Boo didn't get them for me and I definitely wouldn't have purchased them... Maybe they were a free item from smth. They look kinda evil so I immediately contacted Missy (one of my grandpa's maids) to ask her if she and the other girls wanted them. She said yes, so I will soon be free of these cursed entities... Bc fr why is that lemon one lowkey giving "H...

OUgggghhhh welcome to da first Squeakly Photo Dump! This week was me and boo's 3 year anniversary - It's been 3 years since we met on that seedy lil street corner by Jungle bar :33 So the first pic of the week is a page from the cute lil anniversary gift he made me!  Boo made me a lil Bby Rat Care Handbook and some of the pages were enchirnment pages for me to fill in :33 I unfortunately forgot the shape of Borat's hair - _- These next couple of pics are from our anniversary dinner on Tuesday night! It's boo's turn to plan the anniversary activities this year, and he took me to this restaurant in a the city called Carousel! It's arcade and funfair themed. The place looked... Liminal and ai generated and the food was... One of the meals ever served. We may not necessarily be going there again.  Like... It was clearly designed to be aesthetically pleasing and not much else. They had an arcade that u had to pay to ent...

Me: my sister is having a baby soon, I'm gonna be either an aunt or an uncle!  My uncle: ur gonna be an aunt Me: well idk if the baby's gonna be a boy or a girl, I could be an uncle! Unc: why would u be an uncle? Me: well obviously if ur nephew is a boy, ur gonna be an uncle. And if ur nephew is a girl - Unc: ofc ur nephew is gonna be a boy. I should hope it wouldn't be a girl. Me: some nephews can be girls Unc: That's not how it works My grandma: It's relative to you, not to the child.  Me: Oh... So if I'm a niece, my uncle would be an aunt? Boo: I can't tell if ur joking or not...  So anyway my sister is gonna have a girl so my unc was right I will become an aunt :33

Name: Wulffi Known Aliases: Wulffus, Rufus, Wulffito, Wulffisito Age: 5 Threat Level: 💥  Stench Level: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐  Funny? ⭐⭐⭐ Known Crimes: Being EXTREMELY stinky for literally no reason Additional Notes: Only cares abt 2 things: walks and biscuits. Prefers sweet treats over savory ones. Sometimes has coughing fits out of nowhere but they can be miraculously cured by feeding her biscuits. Name: Bruschetta Baguette Rothbart Briquette Known Aliases: Brisquette, Brisket, Brexit, Brisquite, Biscuite Age: 1.5 Threat Level: 💥 💥  Stench Level: ⭐⭐⭐  Funny? ⭐⭐⭐⭐  Known Crimes: Bringing SHIT INTO THE HOUSE TO EAT IT, and honestly just eating way too much in general. Also barking at strangers (we are working on it). Additional Notes: This dog is OVERWEIGHT!!!! Do not overfeed!!! Will readily come into the shower tho and doesn’t seem to hate water. Name: Silky Johnson (At Da Playa Haters Ball) Known Aliases: Silkus, Silko, Shithead (pronounced shuh -thead ), Big Stinker, Bud...